When Luke Burgie was four-years old (back in 1999) he suffered from a "severe gastrointestinal condition" which was apparently cured after two Colorado Springs nuns performed a novena (nine straight days of prayers) to Mother Theresia Bonze a century after her death and who is now on the path to sainthood after the Church deemed her ability to wipe away the diarrhea, a miracle.
Of course, the condition of little Luke Burgie (who is now 18 and freaked the fuck out that his mother gave an interview to a newspaper about his anal issue) remains a bit of a mystery. Burgie was indeed suffering from some stomach issue whereby he pooped himself multiple times a day starting on his first day of preschool but, before the doctors could perform any scientific tests to see why this was happening, it stopped.
Now the Vatican has scheduled the nun for beatification this November (which is the first step toward becoming a Saint) after Pope Francis deemed the nun responsible for relieving the boy of the Hershey Squirts.
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