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'DOG' BY NAT JOHNSON Is A Musical Love Letter To Our Favorite Little Poop Factories

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I don't often cry at things, I mean sure, there was that time when I bawled so deeply while watching The Color Purple that I threw up, but other than that, I can count on both hands the times that tears spilled over my eyelids from deeply felt emotions.

And Dog by songstress Nat Johnson is one of them.

One part animated love story about a dog and one part music video for a song about a dog. That's all it took for me to lose my shit. More than likely I'm in the beginning stages of PMS and was far more susceptible to the beauty of a song about a dog...while I was staring into the deep brown pool of my own dog's eyes...so perhaps I'm overreacting, but I don't think so.


Sometimes, in this auto-tuned mecca of slutty pop star song whores (and I'm including all the dudes in that description as well), it's just nice to hear a song that isn't about Gettin' Money, Makin' Money, Drinking Dom Perignon or Sexin' Some Person, but about something as universal as the all-consuming pet love we have for the little (or big) poop factories that may mess up our house, but always loves us unconditionally.

I'm tearing up just thinking about it now.

I fucking love my dog (sniff).

Video after the break.

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Star Wars: Episode VII Filming Begins

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May 14th was George Lucas's 70th birthday. Rumor has it that principal photography on Episode VII-slated for release in December 2015-started on May 14th as well, and one has to wonder if director JJ Abrams chose that date as a subtle nod to the creator of the franchise.

Even if the coincidence is simply that, the prospect that filming has begun has sparked a new round of the type of rumors that have accompanied the production every step of the way. The script is being closely guarded, with information about the names of new characters and any kind of plot details remaining shrouded in mystery.

All of which leads fans to seek out any possible nuggets of information, while speculation runs wild.

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THROWBACK THURSDAY: The Kenner Hardy Boys Action Figures, Yes, We Totally Had Sh*tty Toys Growing Up In the 70s

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Being a kid in the 70s meant a lot of time making up games with our friends and playing outside because frankly, the toys of our generation kinda sucked (that is until the marketing blitz of Star Wars, after that, it was all cherry).

Take for instance these Kenner Hardy Boys Action Figures. Joe Hardy came with a ridiculous "Guitar Decoder" that searched for clues(?) (which you couldn't see with the naked eye and only worked if you didn't somehow manage to destroy the flimsy red film that slid in and out of the guitar...which you did because you were a kid) while Frank just kinda stood around with nothing to offer...yeah, it was a really great time playing with fucking Frank, let me tell you.

And you know what I ended up doing with Frank and Joe after I wrecked the "Decoder Guitar"? I made them have sex with each other. Yeah, that's right, I forced the Hardy Boys into an incestuous relationship and sometimes I made them party with Ken. BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT KIDS HAD TO DO TO MAKE PLAYING WITH THEIR TOYS EVEN REMOTELY INTERESTING!

After the break is an old advertisement for the shitty Hardy Boys action figures.

God, I hated Frank.

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#EM3 (Eenie Meenie Miney Moe) (review)

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Review by Michelle Delsante
#EM3 or Eenie Meenie Miney Moe is a flick about drugs, sex & money; lots and lots of drugs, sex & money.

I wish the money was real so they could have spent it on a more experienced cast. The male roles seemed to be pretty much on key, the women...ehh. Although beautiful, their acting could be improved. It was shot very well and kept up a fast pace, but you really need to pay attention or it will definitely lose you.

The concept is pretty cool: little fish in a big pond offered an opportunity to turn into the predator. Raul (Andres Dominguez) was well cast, and I thought when he was being more human and less actor, he did well.

But during the times when he was pressed to act, his performance was very unrealistic. He showed great emotion, but his words were spoken without conviction.

Nikki (Belkys Galvez), what can I say...adorable, but no skill playing ANY scene. Ivan was my favorite because he is such a fool.

The movie, as a whole, was not bad.

Not one to buy or see in a theatre, but a rental of 2 bucks or less, sure.

Here’s my breakdown...

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Looking Back On SUPER FUN NIGHT And The Nerd-Girl Loser-Woman

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Today I pour one out for another geek show that, for me, was gone too soon. ABC canceled Super Fun Night late last week.

The show had some geek pedigree: Rebel Wilson starred in it, and Conan O'Brien was an executive producer. Super Fun Night wedged in a Xena parody and musical numbers alongside allergies, hardcore Halloweening and nontraditional sports.

But I guess it just wasn't good enough for the wide slice of American viewing public typically needed to keep a show on a major TV network.

It also didn't help that a seriocomic show targeted at twentysomethings and early-thirtysomethings was running after the (really, really good) comfort food that is Modern Family. You could argue that ABC killed off Super Fun Night in the same way it killed Happy Endings by not giving it a fitting time slot and not having a strategy for how to create blocks of programming that pulls in the young viewers SFN needed.

You also could convincingly argue that despite the refreshing presentation of sitcom characters that were the closest to real people you've seen in a long, long time, the lack of structural elements that make a good TV show – voice, plotting, etc. – also killed the show.


But I come not to bury Super Fun Night, but to praise it for what it did and attempted to do.

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'CARRIE' Imitators: Psychic Teens With The Power To Kill

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Victimized teens with super powers have a long history in horror film.

I WAS A TEENAGE WEREWOLF and I WAS A TEENAGE FRANKENSTEIN (both 1958) are usually considered the first.  But Brian De Palma's adaptation of Stephen King's CARRIE (1976) has remained influential to this day.

Unlike 70s horror predecessors such as THE EXORCIST and THE OMEN, CARRIE focused on teenagers rather than the adults.  And unlike the 1950s predecessors where the antagonists were adults trying to control teenagers, CARRIE's antagonists were teens themselves - teasing and bullying the unfortunate heroine.  (True, Carrie's mother wasn't exactly a help to her daughter, but Carrie's classmates were the instigators at the climactic prom.)


What happens when we focus on teens?  We get a greater sense of uncertainty.  Supernatural powers in teenagers seem scarier, more unstable, more likely to explode out of control.

CARRIE also had a different sort of construction from its predecessors.  Rather than a three-part story or an episodic story, it was a crescendo: a slow buildup to an insane climax (actually a two-part climax which made it even more insane).


CARRIE also had a jolting coda, imitated most famously in FRIDAY THE 13th, but in many other places too, including De Palma's own DRESSED TO KILL.


Given how much could be done with these elements - the variety of powers a teen protagonist might possess, the variety of school settings, the variety in family members or friends - it's not surprising that CARRIE would spawn many imitators.

For the purposes of this article, I'm leaving out the 1999 sequel and the 2013 remake.  I'm looking just at the movies released through the early 1980s that obviously owe debts to CARRIE for featuring teen protagonists with psychic or supernatural powers who strike back at their tormentors in massive anger.

I've written more about each of these films in my Claws & Saucers guidebook, but I hope you'll enjoy my comments, comparisons, and links below.

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BLACK DYNAMITE Makes Its Explosive Blu-Ray and DVD Debut In All-New Adult Swim Release

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Black Dynamite Season One

Available July 15, Series’ Inaugural Blu-ray and DVD Release Includes 10 First Season Episodes
Plus Behind-The-Scenes Featurette Original Pilot and Video Commentaries

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MILLION DOLLAR ARM (review)

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Review by Caitlyn Thompson
Produced by Joe Roth, Mark Ciardi, Gordon Gra
Written by Tom McCarthy
Directed by Craig Gillespie
Starring Jon Hamm, Aasif Mandvi, Bill Paxton
Suraj Sharma, Lake Bell, Alan Arkin


Million Dollar Arm is based on the true story of how sports agent, JB Bernstein (Jon Hamm), recruited the first Indian players for Major League Baseball.

It's a typical sports film stocked with a selfish lead, the humble underdogs, a beautiful yet sensible love interest, and a few quirky sidekicks.

Despite the fact that I didn't really like this movie; I found Million's overarching message somewhat valuable: Bernstein represents the spoiled child who bleeds temper tantrums when he doesn't get his way. Obsessed with materialism, he is a narcissist seemingly incapable of rationality.  Children (hopefully most) do grow out of this.

Rinku (Suraj Sharm) and Dinesh (Madhur Mattil), the two talented and lucky recruits, are the epitome of innocence and wonder. They cherish family above all, they taken nothing for granted, and more, they don't complain, they don't argue, they are simply respectful. It's humbling to watch.

Final moral - let go of materialism and appreciate what you have.

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GODZILLA (review)

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Review by Clay N Ferno
Produced by Thomas Tull, Jon Jashni, 
Mary Parent, Brian Rogers
Screenplay by Max Borenstein
Story by David Callaham
Based on Godzilla by Toho
Directed by Gareth Edwards
Starring Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Ken Watanabe, 
Elizabeth Olsen, Juliette Binoche, 
Sally Hawkins, David Strathairn, Bryan Cranston


Oh no, they say he's got to go go go Godzilla!
— Blue Öyster Cult


With fans screaming in anticipation for the kaiju as equally as for the return of Bryan Cranston since the end of Breaking Bad, 2014’s Godzilla delivers all of that and more.

Is it time to relegate the 1998 film to the archives and stop complaining about it like oh so much Burton’s Planet of the Apes?

The answer is yes!

Let Pacific Rim be your ersatz prequel for this summer giant monster movie that digs deep into the Toho Co. archives for meaning behind Godzilla’s motivations and where he ranks on the good monster vs. bad monster scale.

Is he better thank Neutral Good? You will need to get out and see Godzilla vs. M.U.T.O. to judge for yourself!

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CHEF (review)

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Review by Clay N Ferno
Produced by Jon Favreau, Karen Gilchrist, Sergei Bespalov
Written and Directed by Jon Favreau
Starring Jon Favreau, Sofía Vergara, John Leguizamo, 
Scarlett Johansson, Oliver Platt, Bobby Cannavale, 
Dustin Hoffman, Robert Downey, Jr.


Triple threat Jon Favreau (Swingers, Iron Man) writes, directs and stars in this delightful family friendly comedy about a chef that redefines himself through his cooking, and his relationship to his son after being torn apart by a popular food blogger.

Guest starring half of the cast of Iron Man 2 (Scarlett Johansson, Robert Downey, Jr.), plus other on-screen heavyweights John Leguizamo, Dustin Hoffman and Oliver Platt, Chef is a story about how people touch other people’s hearts with their food.

When food blogger Ramsey Michel (Oliver Platt) descends on Chef Carl Casper’s (Jon Favreau) restaurant, he’s expecting to be wowed like he was in Miami years ago when he saw the young chef in his element.

Now the years have gone by, Carl’s still a great chef with innovative ideas but is held back by ‘playing the hits’ at Riva’s (Hoffman) restaurant.

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Your Pre-Weekend Zen Moment: Girl Swims With Golden Jelly Fish And All Is Right With the World

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Those couple hours between after-lunch and going home during your final day of the work week can actually add more stress to your body than 9am on a Monday.

But I'm here for you. So, take a deep cleansing breath through your mouth and then release it out of your nose. Then, click on the video after the break. What you will witness is the calming visuals of a young girl swimming among millions of golden jellyfish in the aptly named Jellyfish Lake in Palau. Let yourself swim with her (wasting the final hours at work).

See, now wasn't that peaceful?

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Double Feature Movie Show: MOVIE REMIX

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With all the hubbub about sampling…15 years ago…it seems that the time is right to talk about sampling in movies.

Actually, I’m just doing it because I’ve become a fairly recent convert to sampling. Not, like, the last few minutes, but definitely the last few years. I was against it for a long time.

As Keith Richards once said, “You’re not just stealing someone’s line. You’re stealing their actual lick!” Then he destroyed a young band who had a huge hit with a song that used a sample of an orchestral version of a song that he stole from another artist.

I think the story of The Verve is pretty much what did it for me. Bittersweet Symphony is one of the best hits of the 90s.

Yes, it’s partially based on a sample of a Stones song, but, as I said, that Stones song was just an amped up version of This May Be The Last Time by The Staples Singers.

Keith has admitted this, so he’s a hypocrite. Plain and simple.

Either way, I’m here to talk about movies. I could certainly talk about two documentaries that are about sampling. That would be fun, but I like to think outside the box.

And I hate that phrase.

I could think of better ones, but they’re all dirty.

So let’s talk about movies that sample other movies. They take a movie or a bunch of movies and make a completely different story with them.

It’ll be awesome. I promise.


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"I HATE IT HERE", Or How I Learned Not To Be Spider Jerusalem

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 “Journalism is just a gun. It’s only got one bullet in it, but if you aim right, that’s all you need. Aim it right, and you can blow a kneecap off the world.” 
– Spider Jerusalem

It was 1998, I was 19-years-old and I’d just landed a gig writing a weekly column for The George-Anne, Georgia Southern University’s student newspaper.

No topic would be taboo and as long as I wasn’t lewd or libelous, I could say damn near anything I wanted.

I would excel.

I would go on to win multiple awards, cause a controversy or two and become known as “that” columnist amongst the student body and faculty for the four years I would appear on the op-ed page.

And I owed it all to Warren Ellis’ Transmetropolitan.

By ’98 I was a sophomore in college. I had a decent enough freshman year under my belt. I’d made some friends, moved into my first apartment and was making good grades. What I wasn’t doing, however, wasn’t much beyond going to class and hanging out.

That changed when I bumped into a guy I’d lived next door to my freshman year one day on campus. He’d started writing for the student newspaper and he said it was fun. Best of all, though, was that the gig paid. He said I should give it a go.

So we walked up to the newsroom, I was introduced to the staff and just like that I was a reporter.

Meanwhile, my comic reading tastes were changing. I wasn’t getting bored with super heroes, but I was wanting more out of the medium than the spandex set was giving me. I was slowly branching out. Sandman had already gotten it’s hooks into me, as had Alan Moore’s Swamp Thing. But I needed something new, something fresh. And that’s how I ended up snagging a few issues of Transmetropolitan.


If you’ve never read Transmetroplolitan, the series centers around gonzo journalist Spider Jerusalem in some distant-ish future. We never learn the year the comic is set in because the people living in this future world can’t be bothered to remember things like dates. They’re more interested in being constantly entertained. They’re always watching television, they’re always plugged into the Internet and they’re always consuming. Content is king in this world and things like the truth are irrelevant.

Except, of course, to Spider Jerusalem, a reporter pulled out of retirement and back into the journalism game against his will.


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LET'S GO TO THE MOVIES: 'Foxes' with Jodie Foster, Cherie Currie and the Dreamy Scott Baio

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I was never allowed to watch Foxes growing up because my mom was convinced it would give me "ideas", which only made getting my hands on a copy of this 1980 teen drama the top priority of my life. Of course, the moment I got a part time job at a video store she knew that it would be virtually impossible to keep me from seeing any off-limit movies and so, finally, at fifteen, she gave in and gave me carte blanche on bringing home whatever I wanted.

So yeah, I watched this gem of a movie about hardcore drinking, drugs, losing your virginity, parents who ignore you for the disco life, running away and even teenage death...about a thousand times over the years, enjoying it more and more the older I get.

Hell, any movie staring Jodie Foster, Cherie Currie (lead vocalist for The Runaways), Randy Quaid, Scott Baio, Laura Dern and Sally Kellerman is worth your time, especially if you have a couple of hours to kill and want to steep yourself in some serious teen angst that doesn't involve mythological creatures like werewolves, zombies or vampires who sparkle.

Movie after the break.

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WTF FRIDAY: Denmark Corners the Frakking Market on NSFW Voting Propaganda With 'Voteman'

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Do What He Says And No One Gets Hurt

The US is an incredibly lazy, gelatinous smudge on the world when it comes to our population showing up to the polls and voicing their opinion on which candidate will fuck us over the least. Seriously, it's kind of embarrassing. Especially when there are people being killed all over this blue and green ball of ours just so they can participate in some level of democracy.

Shame on us.

And I think it's a good bet that Denamrk doesn't want its citizens to become more like the US on the voting front considering the HOLY-FUCK-WHAT-DID-I-JUST-SEE-GET-OUT-THE-VOTE animated propaganda tool called Voteman that they are airing in order to get young people to the polls.

If something like this hit the air waves here, I could guarantee that the 18-25 year-old crowd would show up to vote in droves...if only to catch sight of a bondage dolphin.

Yeah, you're going to need to watch this a few times to understand that description.

Video after the break.

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The Pull List: RESIDENT ALIEN V.2, ANDRE THE GIANT: LIFE AND LEGEND, PROTECTORS INC V. 1, STAR TREK: KHAN

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graph·ic nov·el
noun 
1.  a novel in comic-strip format.
I read them all.  The good and the bad, so you don't have to.

Welcome to The Pull List.

And, as always...Spoilers ahead!


Resident Alien Volume 2: The Suicide Blonde TPB
Writer: Peter Hogan
Artist: Steve Parkhouse
Cover: Steve Parkhouse
Publisher: Dark Horse Comics
Price: $14.99
Release Date: May 28, 2014

There is something unique about an alien walking among us like he is a member of every day society.

Of course, no one knows that Harry, the titular resident, is from out of town, thanks to his telepathic powers that mask his alien features.

Peter Hogan puts the reader through a loop by constantly conveying Harry’s normalcy until we are brought back to reality with the government agents lurking in the shadows. Asta, Harry’s friend, brings the human element into the equation. She really cares about him, and while she may or may not know his secret, you get the sense that it doesn’t matter to her which makes her extremely likable.

Without context, it’s funny to see a pink skinned, pointy eared doctor helping patients, but Steve Parkhouse did a wonderful job establishing the tone of the story with realistic visuals coupled with solid coloring. I’m a cape and cowl guy when it comes to my comics and I was thoroughly impressed with Resident Alien.

It works on every level of storytelling that presents something fresh where you are vested in this cohesive and creative story.

Score: 8/10


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Get Your JUNE NetFix on!

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After this past Winter from hell, you would have thought most people had consumed everything on Netflix by now.  

Thankfully, while you were binge viewing every season of Miami Vice for the fifth time, I was cultivating this awesome list of MUST WATCH titles for June...



This one caught me by surprise.

I knew absolutely nothing about this B-picture from 1940, and was drawn to it simply by its cast and synopsis.

It’s less Film Noir and more Romantic Suspense (if that’s even a genre), and a touch of old-school Gangster.  Notably, it might be the only Gangster movie to have a gangster named “Steve.”

Joan Bennett (Dark Shadows) is fantastic as the lead character, a departure from the typical male-centric crime movie.

Worth watching alone for the song and dance number centered around a Chihuahua.

BONUS FACT: Hitchcock directed one sequence in this film as a favor to producer Walter Wanger.


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Boston Cinegeeks, Win Tix To See EDGE OF TOMORROW!

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The epic action of “Edge of Tomorrow” unfolds in a near future in which an alien race has hit the Earth in an unrelenting assault, unbeatable by any military unit in the world. Major William Cage (Tom Cruise) is an officer who has never seen a day of combat when he is unceremoniously dropped into what amounts to a suicide mission. Killed within minutes, Cage now finds himself inexplicably thrown into a time loop—forcing him to live out the same brutal combat over and over, fighting and dying again…and again. But with each battle, Cage becomes able to engage the adversaries with increasing skill, alongside Special Forces warrior Rita Vrataski (Emily Blunt). And, as Cage and Rita take the fight to the aliens, each repeated encounter gets them one step closer to defeating the enemy.
And we're giving away passes to Forces of Geek readers to see the film on Monday, June 2nd, at 7pm at the AMX Regal Fenway! 


Visit gofobo.com/rsvp and enter the code: FOG8ZRU for your chance to download complimentary passes.

Just a reminder that tickets are oversold and you should plan on getting there early. Passes and admittance are on a first come first served basis.


Edge of Tomorrow arrives Friday, June 6, 2014 – in 3D, 2D and IMAX theaters nationwide.

For more details visit edgeoftomorrowmovie.com


Age of Uprising: The Legend of Michael Kohlhaas (review)

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Review by Elizabeth Robbins
Produced by Serge Lalou, 
Martina Haubrich, Gunnar Dedio
Directed by Arnaud des Pallières
Written by Christelle Berthevas, Arnaud des Pallières
Based on Michael Kohlhaas by Heinrich von Kleist
Starring Mads Mikkelsen, Bruno Ganz, Paul Bartel, 
Mélusine Mayance, David Kross, Denis Lavant, 
Sergi López, Amira Casar, Roxane Duran


Okay, here’s the deal.

I will watch anything with Mads Mikkelsen in it.

He’s one of those actors that can take crappy story and dialog, and can make something entertaining of it. Give him a great script and you get something phenomenal.

Age of Uprising: The Legend of Michael Kohlhass is one of those films where you get to see what a brilliant actor he is.

Based on a novella, Michael Kohlhass by Heinrich von Kleist, Age of Uprising is the story of the horse-tradesman, Michael Kohlhaas (Mads Mikkelsen), who is wronged by the local Baron (Swann Arlaud) . When his pursuit of justice through legal avenues fail due to a corrupt system, Kohlhaas seeks restitution through more violent means.

Think Braveheart on a less grandiose scale. Except, Kohlhaas does not seek to start a revolution, only what he feels is justice.

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Madefire Signs Four New Comic Book Publishers to Motion Book Platform

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Clive Barker’s Seraphim, Archie, Lion Forge and Arcana sign on as the next
wave of publishers to bring popular titles to the Madefire Motion Books platform

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