That's What She Said: Observations From THE OFFICE Wrap Party In Scranton, PA

May 9, 2013, 9:00 am

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Photo: The Office Wrap Party

This past weekend I, as well as over 10,000 fans, made the pilgrimage to Scranton, Pennsylvania (yes, it's a real place) to help send off The Office into the television netherworld of syndication, forever marking the end to one of the funniest shows on TV that wasn't cancelled by small-minded heads of programming.

I knew that it was going to be a weird trip to make (seeing that I was going to release my strong nerd power on an entire town) and I knew that I was probably going to be "one of those people" who incessantly chats with whomever is around her about the minute subtext of various character's motivations, but to be quite honest, I didn't care. I just wanted to be there. In Scranton. With the cast. Like an insane stalker.

And it was glorious.

After the break is my complete and utter Office Wrap Party freak-out complete with pictures and videos (note: The videos were shot by me, on an iPhone, in a crowd of lunatics. Quality varies, I believe my thumb makes an appearance. I apologize in advice. But at least there's no selfies).

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ARROW: "Darkness on the Edge of Town" S1E22 (recap)

May 9, 2013, 10:00 am

≫ Next: HERE'S A STEAMROLLER Turned Music Box Playing The Star Spangled Banner...Yeah, I Think It's Weird Too

≪ Previous: That's What She Said: Observations From THE OFFICE Wrap Party In Scranton, PA

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By PJ Hruschak

Everyone got a bit of face time this week on Arrow. 

That's because the season is winding down and is promising to end with a bang.

Or, really, an Earth-shattering rumble likely to be accompanied by a series of lesser explosions.

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HERE'S A STEAMROLLER Turned Music Box Playing The Star Spangled Banner...Yeah, I Think It's Weird Too

May 9, 2013, 11:00 am

≫ Next: I Need To Know

≪ Previous: ARROW: "Darkness on the Edge of Town" S1E22 (recap)

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Artist Dave Cole has managed to turn an 11-ton steamroller into a music box that plays the National Anthem in a slow creepy way that makes you think someone is about to come up behind you and slit your throat. 

Now, I don't know if that was his intention, but I don't think I will ever be able to sit through The Star Spangled Banner ever again without feeling terrified (and yes, looking around me so I can get a heads up on anyone about to kill me).

Art certainly is powerful.

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I Need To Know

May 9, 2013, 12:00 pm

≫ Next: BETWEEN TWO FERNS Gets Hijacked By Lonely Island's New Video "Spring Break Anthem" Featuring Appearances By James Franco, Zach Galifianakis and Ed Norton

≪ Previous: HERE'S A STEAMROLLER Turned Music Box Playing The Star Spangled Banner...Yeah, I Think It's Weird Too

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I love knowledge. When it comes to knowing things, I love it.

Lucky for me, I became pretty good at it. No wonder I'm a nerd. And I've been lucky that I am intellectually inclined, did well in school, spent a lot of time reading. But I also try to pick up facts and ideas from pretty much anywhere.

Knowing stuff is part of my personality, my identity. Not just as a nerd, or blerd, but simply as Marvin. I like being the guy who knows things.

It makes me feel useful. The guy who knows things is the guy who has answers.

I had an uncle like that, full of answers, and I revered him for it. When I was a very young child, he taught me about the origins of language and communication. He taught me the riddle of the Sphynx.


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BETWEEN TWO FERNS Gets Hijacked By Lonely Island's New Video "Spring Break Anthem" Featuring Appearances By James Franco, Zach Galifianakis and Ed Norton

May 9, 2013, 1:00 pm

≫ Next: History of Science Fiction Cinema: 1952: The Year of the Slave Girl and The Man of Steel on TV

≪ Previous: I Need To Know

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I had written a bunch of hilarious stuff to introduce this particular episode of Between Two Ferns where Zach Galifiankis berates James Franco before turning it over to musical group Lonely Island (Andy Samberg, Jorma Taccone and Akiva Schaffer), whose Spring Break Anthem is, well...and interesting ode to drinking, puking, being crazy and gay marriage (yes, I said gay marriage).

But really, you kinda just have to see it.

I mean, words sort of fail to capture the beauty of it properly.

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History of Science Fiction Cinema: 1952: The Year of the Slave Girl and The Man of Steel on TV

May 9, 2013, 2:00 pm

≫ Next: SIT ON IT, RIKER: An Entire Supercut of Nothing But Commander Riker Sitting Down...You're Welcome

≪ Previous: BETWEEN TWO FERNS Gets Hijacked By Lonely Island's New Video "Spring Break Anthem" Featuring Appearances By James Franco, Zach Galifianakis and Ed Norton

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As any teenage nerd will tell you (and I still remember being one myself, oh so long ago), being into sci-fi (or for that matter, comics, video games of fantasy role-playing), does not exactly bring all the girls to the yard.

Science Fiction has always been an overwhelmingly male dominated genre, and even though women were the focus of several sci-fi films in 1952, the mere fact that these women were more often than not, sexual objects, slave girls, being kidnapped for breeding purposes or impregnated by a mandrake root (yeah, you read that correctly), the inherent misogyny of the genre would not be changing anytime soon.

To be honest, it really hasn't even changed to this day, but that is another story for another time.

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SIT ON IT, RIKER: An Entire Supercut of Nothing But Commander Riker Sitting Down...You're Welcome

May 9, 2013, 3:00 pm

≫ Next: PSYCH: "Office Space" S7E11 (recap)

≪ Previous: History of Science Fiction Cinema: 1952: The Year of the Slave Girl and The Man of Steel on TV

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One assumes that to become second-in-command of a Galaxy Class Starship, one would know how to properly sit in a chair.

Unfortunately, as this supercut demonstrates, Riker (Jonathan Frakes) thinks of chairs as nothing more than horses (or women, depending on his mood) and proceeds to mount them in a way that feels sort of threatening.

God only knows what the man does when he has sit on a toilet.

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PSYCH: "Office Space" S7E11 (recap)

May 9, 2013, 4:00 pm

≫ Next: TRIPLE SHOT: TWELVE REASONS TO DIE #1, X #1 and ARCHER AND ARMSTRONG #0

≪ Previous: SIT ON IT, RIKER: An Entire Supercut of Nothing But Commander Riker Sitting Down...You're Welcome

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By Morayo Sayles

Well it finally happened; after years of shenanigans, mischief and barely contained mayhem, the Psych duo of Shawn Spencer (James Roday) and Burton Guster (Dule Hill) landed themselves in mighty hot water when they despoil a crime scene.

It all begins when a frantic and uncharacteristically filthy Gus shows up in the middle of the night at Shawn and Juliet’s home desperately seeking Shawn’s help.

Gus did a bad, bad thing and brought Shawn along for the ride!


After witnessing his boss’s abusive and blatantly ILLEGAL treatment of an office assistant, Gus experiences a rush of adrenaline worthy of legendary story book heroes and demonstrates some major cojones, by standing up to his boss in front of the whole office and then later in a fit of pique, quitting his job via inter-office note. 

Hours later, adrenaline rush faded and reality sinking in, Gus returns to his place of prior employment to retrieve his note, in hopes that his boss has not read it and he can return to work the next day relatively unscathed.


Read more »

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TRIPLE SHOT: TWELVE REASONS TO DIE #1, X #1 and ARCHER AND ARMSTRONG #0

May 9, 2013, 5:00 pm

≫ Next: Contest! Win THE ASSASSIN'S BLADE on Blu-ray!

≪ Previous: PSYCH: "Office Space" S7E11 (recap)

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It’s a numbers games as we dip into the 36 Chambers of Death with Ghostface Killah in the new book Twelve Reasons To Die.  Travel back in time with Archer and Armstrong #0 and take a dark turn with Dark Horse and Duane Swierczynski punishing the criminal bosses in city of Arcadia for a new number #1 of cult anti-hero, X.

TWELVE REASONS TO DIE #1
CONCEPT: Ghostface Killah, Adrian Younge
WRITER: Matthew Rosenberg, CE Garcia, Patrick Kindlon
ART: Breno Tamura, Gus Storms, Kyle Strahm, Joe Infurnari, Dave Murdoch
Publication Date: May 8, 2013
Price: $3.50
Publisher: Black Mask Comics in association with Soul Temple Entertainment LLC
UPC: 045778022014
Buy it HERE


“Up from the 36 Chambers...it’s the Ghostface Killah”, these lyrics from Clan in Da Front weren’t what I expected to yell when I went into the LCS on Wednesday, but I did, scaring some kids there getting some leftover Free Comic Book Day swag.


As you can tell from the credits, this hip-hop comic comes to you from a creative team that goes all the way up to the executive producer RZA.

Accompanying this book is a record and tour of the same name by hotshot producer Adrian Younge and Ghostface.

The comic starts off with words like ‘pussy’ and ‘motherfucker’ and that sets the tone for the book.

Like Ghost’s lyrical flow, the comic references gangster history going back to the 40s through the 60s, and it isn’t too long before we are introduced to his alter-ego and star of the book, gang enforcer, the “other” Antony Starks. From La Costa Nostra to modern day nightclub drug deals, it’s grim and gritty. The artwork, benefitting from different artists in the first issue is dark and breaks off chapters well. Just like a RZA beat, nothing here is extraneous. All tells the story.

From the solicit as we find out that Anthony Starks is an enforcer for the DeLuca crime family in the 1960s. The family murders him after he falls in love with the kingpin’s daughter. You won’t know this from the first issue, but it is helpful background.

Starks remains are pressed into a dozen vinyl records and when played, the record invokes the spirit of Ghostface Killah, exacting revenge on his murderers.

High concept, great art and all accompanied by a soundtrack album that is already highly regarded? I am so down. This really is the summer of Ironman.

I didn’t even get to tell you about Black Mask Comics, a new publishing company from creator Steve Niles. We’re expecting great things from this new venture as well.

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Contest! Win THE ASSASSIN'S BLADE on Blu-ray!

May 9, 2013, 6:00 pm

≫ Next: Mother's Day Gift's For That Pop Culture Lovin' Lady

≪ Previous: TRIPLE SHOT: TWELVE REASONS TO DIE #1, X #1 and ARCHER AND ARMSTRONG #0

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Zhu Yanzhi (Charlene Choi) is the daughter of a wealthy wine merchant (Ti Lung), sent into the mountains disguised as a man to learn martial arts with an elite clan.

Once she begins her intense training, Zhu finds herself at odds with her trainer and superior, Liang (Chun Wu). But soon, a stronger connection is revealed between the two, and as their attraction grows, so does the danger of Liang discovering Zhu’s real identity,  Could it be that they're destined to be together?

As the two lovers dare voice their feelings, Zhu learns that her parents are in danger and she must return home immediately, in the company of a childhood friend who also happens to be an aspiring court politician. Could there be more to his intentions than she knows?  

From the action director of HERO and HOUSE OF FLYING DAGGERS, this comedy romance crackles with action, danger, hidden identities and unrequited love.

And we're giving away three copies!


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Mother's Day Gift's For That Pop Culture Lovin' Lady

May 9, 2013, 7:00 pm

≫ Next: Damning with Faint Praise: JOHN DIES AT THE END

≪ Previous: Contest! Win THE ASSASSIN'S BLADE on Blu-ray!

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Selections by Elizabeth Weitz and Stefan Blitz

This Sunday is Mother's Day, an actual holiday (at least as deemed by Hallmark, retailers, florists and restaurants) that reminds you to recognize the mom (or maternal figure) in your life.

And while cards, flowers, brunch, candles, and perfumes are nice, here are some of our suggestions.

Word to your mother.


Molecular Mixology Set - Mojito Mix

What do you get when you combine food, liquor, chemistry, and art? You get to deconstruct your favorite drink, to change the look and feel of ingredients, impress dinner guests, and to take your tastebuds on an adventure—also known as molecular gastronomy!

Try this fresh take on the classic mint-and-rum refresher to take drinks and entertaining to a whole new level. Deconstruct mint leaves into buoyant "caviar" bubbles or a flavor-filled cloud of foam. It's even possible to encapsulate every ingredient into a sphere that explodes with flavor, introducing your tastebuds to the essence of the cocktail. Give guests a taste of the unexpected with these three easy molecular recipes that bring cutting-edge mixology to your home bar. Includes instructional booklet.

Jump From Paper Bags

Jump From Paper bags were invented by two women in Taiwan who thought it would be awesome to bring 2D illustrated bags to life. These three bags feature bold outlines, bright and vibrant colors, and will definitely turn heads. In a way, they remind us of those movies when 2D animation was mixed in with live actors... like you hopped into Toontown from Who Framed Roger Rabbit, bought yourself a nice bag, and brought it back to the real world.

These bags are super slim in appearance but can accommodate an iPad/tablet, your current reading project, magazines, and your everyday accessories. If you need a little extra room, a zipper under the bag expands the depth. These bags are made from durable polyester fabric and each has a zipper pocket in the back for easy access to your ID, metro card, or spare change.

 The Amazing Unicycle Show Tote Bag 

From Stephanie Buscema!  These totes are a natural colored cotton with dark chocolate brown handles. My circus design is silkscreened with two colors, a dark chocolate brown and a bright robin egg blue. A nice, light, well-made tote!

"Be Nice, Work Hard, Get Rad." Screenprinted Poster

From Hannah Nance Partlow! Words to live by! This super-cool inspirational poster would look rad in your office, studio, or workplace. Available in three color variations - please specify when ordering: Black with pale yellow shadow, black with yellow and red shadows, or "ketchup and mustard" (red with yellow shadow).

These posters are printed by hand, so slight variations may occur. That's what makes screenprints so much cooler than a crappy poster made on a machine, right? Handmade for life, man. ♥

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Damning with Faint Praise: JOHN DIES AT THE END

May 10, 2013, 6:00 am

≫ Next: The Great Gatsby (review)

≪ Previous: Mother's Day Gift's For That Pop Culture Lovin' Lady

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Dave and John, two college drop-outs, are all that stands between humanity and threats from parallel universes.

Or John is dead and Dave has suffered a psychotic break after taking a new street drug nicknamed "Soy Sauce."

This sci-fi/horror/black comedy is about how that happened.

Verdict 
Saying that this is a Don Coscarelli movie does not prepare you for how weird it is.




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The Great Gatsby (review)

May 10, 2013, 7:00 am

≫ Next: Diary of an Ereader, Part Two: Equiring an Ereader

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Review by Caitlyn Thompson

Produced by Baz Luhrmann, Douglas Wick,

Lucy Fisher, Catherine Martin, Catherine Knapman

Screenplay by Baz Luhrmann, Craig Pearce

Based on The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald

Directed by Baz Luhrmann

Starring Leonardo DiCaprio, Tobey Maguire,

Carey Mulligan, Joel Edgerton, Isla Fisher,

Jason Clarke, Elizabeth Debicki, Amitabh Bachcha

Warner Bros. / Rated PG-13

The Great Gatsby– the illustrious tale of mysterious millionaire, Jay Gatsby as told through his modest (and quite critical) neighbor, Nick Carraway.

There’s a love triangle, there are lavishing parties, but the film was devoid of emotion and an onscreen bright-color-costume mess.

Don’t get me wrong – I like Baz Luhrmann.

He has done beautiful work with Moulin Rouge and Romeo + Juliet but his The Great Gatsby is frenzied and lacks the poignancy of the classic novel.


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Diary of an Ereader, Part Two: Equiring an Ereader

May 10, 2013, 8:00 am

≫ Next: DAVID FOSTER WALLACE'S 2005 Commencement Address to Kenyon College Just Might Save Humanity

≪ Previous: The Great Gatsby (review)

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Half the reason I chose to finally get myself an ereader was for the digital review copy aspect.  I’ve been reviewing books for over a decade and with the development and growth over the last few years of not just ebooks, but also the world of digital review copies and ebook reviewing, I couldn’t help but feel I was missing out on a facet of reviewing. 

I rarely don’t have my next book picked out and waiting to be read and reviewed on my shelf, but I knew there were virtual shelves of books out there that I could be e-partaking of.

But first I had to get myself an ereader, which is an interesting story in itself.

If you’re any sort of book fan who enjoys frequenting used bookstores, then you’ve probably heard of Powell's in Oregon.  They have a couple of stores, and their mighty, multi-storied one is in Portland has its own special map to help you find your way around its labyrinthine stacks. 

Going there for a book lover must be like going to Disneyland; one day I’ll go. 

Powell's also has a full website where one can buy both new and used books, as well as DVDs and movies.  The other great thing about the Powell's website is you can sell your used books there.  It’s an ingeniously simple process. 


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DAVID FOSTER WALLACE'S 2005 Commencement Address to Kenyon College Just Might Save Humanity

May 10, 2013, 9:00 am

≫ Next: Avengers Assemble?

≪ Previous: Diary of an Ereader, Part Two: Equiring an Ereader

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David Foster Wallace (Infinite Jest) was an American author whose work is what you would describe as "Important". Meaning that it was filled with ideas of such preponderance that it could occasionally reveal some truth hidden deep inside the reader that could change them completely.

Yeah, he was simply that good.

In 2005 he gave a commencement address to the graduating class of Kenyon College in Ohio where he laid down those lofty ideas of truth to a group of Seniors who were, most likely, filled with the optimism and excitement that only those who are on the precipice of "Real Life" can feel or appreciate and who were not yet able to see that the road before them was pot-holed and battered (that realization comes to you only after you have been walking on it for a while).

He did not tell them these things to scare them out of that place of optimistic delight or to showcase what a jaded and bitter future lay before them, but to tell them they had the power to choose what kind of life they could have, that education and knowledge and choice are all wrapped up together and we have the ability to move past our own needs and desires and instead, become empathetic to those around us.

It is probably one of the most beautiful and life-altering speeches ever given. 

And thankfully, the film making-team of The Glossary has managed to create a moving tribute to Wallace's words (which were tragically cut short when he ended his life in 2008 after battling severe, mind-fuck depression for most of his life) that capture them perfectly.

After the break is the video as well as a link to his full speech.

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Avengers Assemble?

May 10, 2013, 10:00 am

≫ Next: WE SHOULD MAKE STRANGE THINGS: An Animated Short About, Well...Strange Things

≪ Previous: DAVID FOSTER WALLACE'S 2005 Commencement Address to Kenyon College Just Might Save Humanity

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After previously discussing the ever growing relationship between Marvel’s movie and publishing properties, let’s dive into another facet of the movies impacting the comics: expansion.

Marvel’s comic book publications start to aggressively expand whenever a film adaptation arrives.

This should be no surprise to anyone, as the company obviously wants to grab as many readers as possible when their characters are plastered on lunchboxes and buildings all over the world.

But how much is too much?

It seems that Marvel is constantly releasing series upon series whenever a new adaptation is released, and nowhere is this more apparent than with The Avengers, the superhero team that broke box office records last May.

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WE SHOULD MAKE STRANGE THINGS: An Animated Short About, Well...Strange Things

May 10, 2013, 11:00 am

≫ Next: View From The Brig(gs) Episode 9: Rise Of The Titan

≪ Previous: Avengers Assemble?

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The Japanese are purveyors of the strange so this animated ode to the spirit of creativity and oddness by the Japanese animation studio Tange Films seems pretty fitting.

And incredibly beautiful. Really, it's like eye-candy for someone experiencing a psychotic break. 

Watch and enjoy.

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View From The Brig(gs) Episode 9: Rise Of The Titan

May 10, 2013, 12:00 pm

≫ Next: FOODFIGHT!: Just How Bad Do You Want to See The Worst Animated Movie Ever?

≪ Previous: WE SHOULD MAKE STRANGE THINGS: An Animated Short About, Well...Strange Things

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Hey, Briggonauts.

I can't sugar-coat this one. It trended (sadly) all over the web three days ago, and the Fan-O-Sphere had a collective group hug.  I was right there alongside them. Ray Harryhausen, Master Of Dynamation, passed away at the venerable age of 92.

Way back in the mists of time, IGN magazine approached me for their "Ten Questions" feature, and I cited Ray as a particular inspiration for "fueling a kid's imagination".

My Dad similarly loved his movies before me, and some of our greatest father-son memories were sitting with Dad watching "Jason And The Argonauts" especially on vacation television (and this is back in the dawn of prehistory, when there weren't even VCRs, and you had to watch a movie through without interruption).

My dad would cook a "Special Breakfast" that accompanied "Jason" (and others), and I still think it's weird I associate the smell of grilled mushrooms with the visage of the gargantuan steel giant Talos rounding a rocky promontory. (I'm an avid collector of all things Talos, by-the-by.)

When Tom Hanks stood at the Academy Awards and cited "Jason And The Argonauts" as one of the greatest movies ever made, I felt those little prickles at the corner of my eye.

Gary Kurtz (producer of "Star Wars", and the movie we're making, "Panzer 88") lives in London, as did Ray, and the two of them were friendly with one another. I had needled Gary once or twice to get me an introduction to meet Ray. I guess now I never will.

In some halcyon dimension somewhere, I'm willing to bet that the two Rays, Harryhausen and Bradbury, friends from childhood Los Angeles are back together in some celestial Airstream diner, hunkered down on red vinyl stools and talking dinosaurs and spaceships once more.

Adios, Ray. You were an even bigger Titan than the ones you brought to life.


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FOODFIGHT!: Just How Bad Do You Want to See The Worst Animated Movie Ever?

May 10, 2013, 1:00 pm

≫ Next: MY TOP 5: BEST MOVIE CARS

≪ Previous: View From The Brig(gs) Episode 9: Rise Of The Titan

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Okay, so here's the lowdown on FoodFight!

From what I gather from many reputable sources (Hell, I'm not going to watch this thing all the way through) FoodFight! was created to be a Toy Story knock-off about brand-name food products that come to life after the grocery store is closed.

Apparently this horrible thing (which is so poorly animated that you would think it was a 90-minute outtake of every glitch and rendering problem encountered during the making of it) was actually made in 2004 but has only appeared on US shelves in 2013 (It was released in Europe last year) because someone needed to make a quick buck.

The startling thing about this production is that it actually attracted talent in the form of voice actors (Charlie Sheen, Hilary Duff, Eva Longoria, Wayne Brady, Christopher Lloyd, Ed Asner, Chris Kattan, Larry Miller, Christine Baranski, Cloris Leachman, Harvey Fierstein) and actual animators that have skill.

So why is this thing so horrible? Could it be the 80 or so product placement characters that seemingly have no real purpose? The fact that every scene looks like it's straight of the 90's? Maybe it could be the fact that Hillary Duff's character Sunshine Goodness (wtf?) looks what I imagine happens to one's brain during a Roofie episode:

Who knows?

But watch the trailer after the break and then try and see the movie if you can.

I'm sure you will suffer, but it might be a good suffering.

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MY TOP 5: BEST MOVIE CARS

May 10, 2013, 2:00 pm

≫ Next: INDELICATE DOILY COASTERS: A Gracious Host Provides the Drinks While Gracious Guests Stop Ruining the F*cking Coffee Table

≪ Previous: FOODFIGHT!: Just How Bad Do You Want to See The Worst Animated Movie Ever?

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A couple of weeks ago, one of my greatest fears finally came true: I was in a car wreck that totaled my beloved Nissan Frontier.

The wreck really wasn't THAT bad, but the truck was 15 years old and had 166,000 miles on it. No way was the insurance company going to let me fix it.

Many people don't understand the love that a man can have for his car. I never thought that I would, but I certainly do now. I'll miss my little truck forever.

To commemorate that love (which, honestly, goes deeper than my love for most people), I give you the five greatest cars in film history.

Keep in mind, I'm a child of the 80s and I haven't seen Bullitt in years.

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