Don't Think VADER Will Be Back For Episode VII? I Find Your Lack of Faith Disturbing

January 10, 2013, 4:00 pm

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By Atlee Greene

Disney purchased Lucasfilm for a cool $4 billion dollars and are wasting no time playing with their new toys. Star Wars: Episode VII will be released in 2015 and fanboy speculation is already at a fever pitch. What is the premise of the film? Who is going to direct? Will the original cast reprise their roles? Are they based on the novels/comics?  What characters will grace us with their on screen presence? The possibilities are endless but there is one scenario in particular that I believe is guaranteed to occur; Darth Vader will return!


I know you are already thinking, "There's no way this can happen since he died at the end of Return of the Jedi, right?" While that is a hard detail to overlook, this is science fiction where absolutely anything can happen. Disney can make buku money by allowing the Dark Lord to rise from the ashes and in the words of Jay-Z, “Allow me to reintroduce myself. My name is Vader.”

While Star Wars has produced some of the most iconic characters in movie history, Darth Vader is the horse that drives the cart. All of the movies revolve around him and there is no one who can spread fear across the galaxy quite like Vader. Imagine the new wave of Darth Vader merchandise that would be released as a result of his return. This is a no brainer for Disney!

Creating a new lead villain is a losing battle. Whatever character they conjure up will instantly be compared to Darth Vader and anything that is even on par with the dark lord will be a failure. It’s not outside the realm of possibility that an even cooler bad guy be created but it is awfully hard to think of one. Darth Maul is great, but he could have been epic. Count Dooku was some old dude with force powers and General Grievous was just a four armed cyborg who coughed a lot.

How do we bring Darth Vader back from the dead, you may ask? While there are talented writers such as Michael Arndt and others creating the goods for Episode VII, let me put my thinking cap on and see what I can come up with.


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Contest! Win THE JACKSON 5IVE: THE ANIMATED SERIES Blu-ray Combo Pack!

January 10, 2013, 8:15 pm

≫ Next: FOG! Exclusive: THE SLENDER MAN Heads To Film?

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The Jackson5ive TV series, produced by Rankin/Bass and Motown Productions, originally aired on ABC from September 11, 1971 through October 14, 1972, and was loosely based on the life of the Jackson5ive band members, Jackie, Tito, Jermaine, Marlon and Michael, and their manager, Berry Gordy. Maybe you remember the episodes’ featured Jackson5ive songs and storylines where the band is challenged and faced with adversity. The cartoon paid homage to the band’s musical influences with hidden references, and helped to transcend color and gender barriers of its time. 

For the FIRST-TIME EVER the complete animated Jackson5ive TV series, including 23 FULL-LENGTH EPISODES and 46 ORIGINAL JACKSON5IVE SONGS, is available to fans everywhere!  With two complete songs in each episode you can join JACKIE, TITO, JERMAINE, MARLON and MICHAEL on tour, laughing at their crazy adventures and singing your heart out along the way!

And we're giving away FIVE copies of the Blu-ray combo pack!

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FOG! Exclusive: THE SLENDER MAN Heads To Film?

January 11, 2013, 6:00 am

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I received a tip that director Brian Skiba (The Jonas Project, upcoming .357) is currently working on a found footage film based on the video game Slender: The Eight Pages.  The game centers around the fakelore urban legend of the Slender Man, which Wikipedia describes as a, "frightening malevolent entity, a tall thin man wearing a suit, who lacks a face, "his" head only being blank, white and featureless."  The film has been described to me as terrifying with amazing effects work.  Production is slated to begin in March in Louisiana.  More news as it develops.

GANGSTER SQUAD Shoots Blanks (review)

January 11, 2013, 7:00 am

≫ Next: 30 ROCK: "Game Over" S7/E9 (review)

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Review by Caitlyn Thompson

Gangster Squad
Produced by Dan Lin, Kevin McCormick, Michael Tadross
Screenplay by Will Beall
Based on Tales from the Gangster Squad by Paul Lieberman
Directed by Ruben Fleischer
Starring Josh Brolin, Ryan Gosling, Nick Nolte, Emma Stone, Sean Penn, Anthony Mackie, Giovanni Ribisi, Michael Peña, Robert Patrick

Warner Bros. / Rated R


Gangster Squadis the story of a team of misfit cops trying to defeat the biggest mobster in Los Angeles.

Mickey Cohen, played by Sean Penn, has intentions of complete dominion over the West Coast while his opposition, Sergeant Generic Irish Name (actually John O’Mara), played by Josh Brolin, is a war hero seeking his next righteous crusade—unfortunately, there is no personal vendetta introduced between the characters so it is difficult to care about the motive of either side.  The fact that they mention Mickey Cohen is Jewish and relentlessly violent doesn’t add anything to the character, if it is supposed to be exceptional for the time period, it doesn’t prove itself valuable, character wise.

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30 ROCK: "Game Over" S7/E9 (review)

January 11, 2013, 8:00 am

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By PJ Hruschak

30 Rock's "Game Over" Shows the Show is not Over 'Til it's Over

After a month break and a lot of entertainment news about the show's cancellation, salaries, blah blah blah,  30 Rock begins the last half of its seventh and final season with a rapid-fire guest appearance-a-palooza episode oddly, but realistically, titled "Game Over." (In fact, series filming has wrapped for good). It does well keeping up with two main plots (Liz and Jack) and a silly, lesser side story (Tracy).

This episode takes place well outside of the usual studio faire and characters for most of the episode, beginning in a hospital with Dr. Spaceman (Chris Parnell) who makes a quick diagnosis and prescription for Pitocin for Liz Lemon (Tina Fey) and is pulled away to work for the government. Yes, it pays to remain insane.

The Jack Donaghy (Alec Baldwin) story line involves the down-home hick KableTown owner, Hank Hooper (Ken Howard), making Jack an Assistant CEO to his granddaughter, Kaylie Hooper (Chloe Grace Moretz). It's the perfect nonexistent title offering the most demeaning realization of Jack's fears.

The tertiary story is Tracy Jordan (Tracy Morgan) as a film director, making a movie about Harriet only to have the main actress, celeb Octavia Spencer, pull a Jordan and go completely crazicles. Realizing what's happening, Tracy decides to go Liz Lemon which, as you can imagine, means spouting phrases that seem like things Liz would say and wearing an identical outfit.

Other guest appearances include a quick take on the mock TV series "Celebrity Homonym" featuring tennis pro and sports commentator John McEnroe dealing with the work "racket." Hilarity ensues.
Back to Liz, her drugs turn her hyper sensitive and hormonal which manifests itself in rapid-fire acting that only Fey can execute. That scene comes with a pair of nice touches including Jack's emotional reaction business card that reads, "There, there." and his yelling at the floor to his dead mother.

"Octavia. Excellent, You're Black"
Back to Jordan's movie, Octavia goes entirely loopy, pulling in lines from the earliest episodes of the series ("Sounds like a 'X' problem"). She'll eventually give her own rendition of, "I'm a Jedi," Jordan's staple crazy move.

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WARM THE COCKLES OF YOUR PIPE With A Handmade Classic Videogame Throw

January 11, 2013, 9:00 am

≫ Next: Smallville: Random, Awesome and WTF?! - S10E2: Shield

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Ahhh...yes, it's that time of year again when the cold ravishing winds of Winter sweep across the vast tundra of the US and bring with it a lovely passenger known as the flu, which will no doubt leave you shivering, achy and probably high on Theraflu for the next couple of weeks.

So why not use all those sick days you are cruising through to do something nice for your pathetic sick ass, and invest in a cozy handcrafted blanky that will not only warm your body, but also the deep recesses of nostalgia.

Like perhaps, wrapping yourself up in a knitted screenshot from Donkey Kong?
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Smallville: Random, Awesome and WTF?! - S10E2: Shield

January 11, 2013, 10:00 am

≫ Next: PLAY FIND THE NIPPLE With These Pop Art-Inspired Body Paintings By Artist Emma Hack

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Cat Grant—a completely different one than the one that briefly appeared earlier in the season, mind you, that she claims is no relation to the woman we’ve seen on TV—starts trying to make a name for herself at The Daily Planet and winds up drawing the attention of Deadshot.

When a guy’s name is Deadshot and he’s on the Suicide Squad, you know things are hitting the fan.

The Random:
1. Godfrey makes himself known as a fiery talk show Limbaugh-esque personality bent on spreading anti-hero propaganda to the masses.  Why?  Because he’s a messenger of Darkseid himself and he’s just paving the way.

2. Green Arrow’s disarming of Cat is pretty amusing, especially since she has like forty potential weapons in her purse.

3. Chloe has to get some props for faking her own death and fooling even Suicide Squad.  But now Ollie knows and feels guilty and he’s going to have to do something about it, maybe even in the next episode.  Actually, no maybe about it.  It’s going to happen.

That purse was like a bottomless pit…

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PLAY FIND THE NIPPLE With These Pop Art-Inspired Body Paintings By Artist Emma Hack

January 11, 2013, 11:00 am

≫ Next: The Book Dump, or What People Are Reading

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As someone who gets to see two awesome boobies everyday thanks to the XX gene, I must say that naked chicks slathered in paint really don't do it for me, but I can see how it would be nice for others so, this post is for you.

Besides, artist Emma Hack certainly isn't a stranger to painting naked people (her Car Crash Naked Sculpture was a "hit" for the Motor Accident Commission in Australia) and she continues her work with the female form by introducing a series of "Paintings" inspired by the Pop Art movement (and, Roy Lichtenstein, in particular it seems).
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The Book Dump, or What People Are Reading

January 11, 2013, 12:00 pm

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From February through July of this year, a good solid six-month period, I worked in the book department at Dimple Records in Sacramento.  Most of my job consisted of unboxing, sorting and shelving thousands and thousands of books that had been purchased for the company through their used book buyback program, available at all of their retail stores.  There were literally boxes and boxes of books coming into the warehouse each day from the various stores, and it was my job to organize them and get them put on the shelf in the right sections.

Another warehouse consisted of many rows of shelves all sectioned and organized by subject and genre.  For the first few months I quickly filled up these shelves, and then when they were full and all set to go, the books and shelves were taken to the Citrus Heights store location, which was remodeled and organized to accommodate all these new books.  There were approximately 15,000 used books made available at the Citrus Heights store.

And then my work began again from scratch, as I began filling up all news shelves for what would eventually become the first (of hopefully many) Dimple Books book stores which opened its doors in July.  At this store there were over 30,000 used books.  In my time with Dimple I sorted through and organized over 50,000 books.


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STAR WARS R2-D2 DOG COLLAR: Turn Fido Into A Droid...That Unfortunately Still Poops

January 11, 2013, 1:00 pm

≫ Next: Marvel Comics Silver Age DisContinuity 002 Fantastic Four #2

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I'm always looking for ways to make my dog Walter a bit more uncomfortable. After-all, the little shit wakes me up at two in the morning every day by BELCHING IN MY FACE and he deserves a little payback. 

And, although this Star Wars dog collar is probably more classy than he deserves, I can't help but long to wrap it around his neck and show off my little R2-D2 pup as he humps my neighbor's lawn ornaments. Which, by the way, he tends to do quite ferociously (you should have seen what he did to all to random Baby-Jesus-in-a-manger-scenes in my neighborhood during the holidays...that was some serious heresy I tell you).
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Marvel Comics Silver Age DisContinuity 002 Fantastic Four #2

January 11, 2013, 2:00 pm

≫ Next: WTF FRIDAY: Fashion and Technology Meet To Create A Robotic Spider Dress...Awesome, Now I Can Be Scared Of Yet Another Thing That Can Kill Me

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One of the greatest guides to the concept of continuity in a specific series is The DisContinuity Guide: The Unofficial Doctor Who Companionby Paul Cornell, Martin Day and Keith Topping, first put out in 1995. From my point of view the genius of this work is in the way the authors peel back the layers of a complex text like Doctor Who, and start back at the beginning, when we didn't know anything about the series or what it would eventually evolve into.

This allows us to see the ways in which the universe was expanded, sometimes carefully, often times not. We get to see undeveloped themes and the earliest examples of new themes.

Like an evolutionary biologist studying our small, brown furred burrowing human ancestors, we get a look at the way things were without the baggage of the way things are.

This is the second of a series of posts in which I hope to look at Marvel Comics the same way.

Marvel Comics DisContinuity 002 

Fantastic Four #002

Title(s) :

The Fantastic Four Meet the Skrulls from Outer Space

Prisoner of the Skrulls

The Fantastic Four Fight Back!

The Fantastic Four... Captured!

Publication Date/On Sale Date : 

January 1962/September 1961

Writer/Artists : 

Stan Lee, Jack Kirby

Sources : 

Invasion of the Body Snatchers, Adventures of Superman episode "Three in One", Martian Manhunter

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WTF FRIDAY: Fashion and Technology Meet To Create A Robotic Spider Dress...Awesome, Now I Can Be Scared Of Yet Another Thing That Can Kill Me

January 11, 2013, 3:00 pm

≫ Next: ENTER THE PANTHER A Look Back At The Adventures of Jason Blade

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Look, I am totally for smart, creative people like artist Anouk Wipprecht to design amazing fashions that will stun and amaze an audience, but I think that perhaps marrying two distinctly different species like spiders and robots might just be our undoing and could lead to a world where I am perpetually hiding in my basement with a can of raid and a doomsday device of some kind.

Perhaps it was because as a small, impressionable kid I was forced to watch Kingdom of the Spiders by my emotionally scarring parents (and yes, at three, this was my first introduction to William Shatner) that I have learned to loathe the arachnids that share our planet, but in recent years that arachnophobia has been replaced by a shattering Automatonophobia (fear of robots) that leaves me shaken to my core (thanks Robopocalypse).

And now someone has gone ahead and made a robot spider dress that will certainly kill us all.
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ENTER THE PANTHER A Look Back At The Adventures of Jason Blade

January 11, 2013, 4:00 pm

≫ Next: Contest! Win THE HOUR 2, Series 2 on Blu-ray!

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Forces of Geek delves into the video vault for a double bill of high kicking Ozploitation helmed by the one and only Brian Trenchard Smith, director of everything from Turkey Shoot (AKA Death Camp Thatcher!), BMX Banditswith a young Nicole Kidman to the original Man from Hong Kong which starred The One Armed Swordsmanhimself, Jimmy Wang Yu, alongside one-time James Bond,George Lazenby.

In the late 80’s, Trenchard-Smith would return to the world of martial arts movie making with the films Day of the Panther and Strike of the Panther, introducing the world to an Antipodean martial arts hero played by Edward Stazek, it’s time for Forces of Geek’s Man from Hong Kong and Panther fan extraordinaire Big Mike Leeder to look back at both films…

WARNING:THE FOLLOWING FILMS DO FEATURE VERY 1980’s MIAMI VICE INSPIRED FASHION, HAIRSTYLES AND MUCH MORE..CONTINUE AT YOUR OWN RISK!

ENTER THE PANTHER

A Look Back at the Adventures of Jason Blade

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Contest! Win THE HOUR 2, Series 2 on Blu-ray!

January 11, 2013, 5:00 pm

≫ Next: FOG! Exclusive: Check Out The COMICS & GAMES Excerpt From The 2013 Guinness World Records Gamer's Edition

≪ Previous: ENTER THE PANTHER A Look Back At The Adventures of Jason Blade

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Season two rejoins The Hour team a year on in 1957 where we are introduced to new characters played by Peter Capaldi (The Thick Of It, The Nativity) Hannah Tointon (The Inbetweeners) and Tom Burke (State of Play)who join Dominic West, Romola Garai and Ben Whishaw. The six new episodes will see the team still striving to broadcast the stories they believe in as they grapple with the looming specter of the Cold War and changing social mores. With the space race and nuclear power, Britain seems on the threshold of a new era of modernization, economic optimism, scientific progress and cultural change in the face of new immigration from the Commonwealth. But under the buoyant veneer, our characters become deeply embroiled in cover-ups, sexual intrigues and the resurgence of Mosley's fascism.

And we're giving away three copies!

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FOG! Exclusive: Check Out The COMICS & GAMES Excerpt From The 2013 Guinness World Records Gamer's Edition

January 11, 2013, 6:00 pm

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This week, the 2013 The Guinness World Records Gamer's Edition was released and is truly the ultimate and complete guide to videogames, packed full of the most up-to-date news, achievements and developments in the gaming world, illustrated with the best and most exciting imagery from this year's top titles. Complete with fascinating facts and figures and full features on the most popular games, the 2013 edition also includes gameplay tips and hints, retro facts from classic games and the results of a reader's poll on the top 50 most visually stunning games.


And thanks to our friends who are usually too busy measuring the world's fastest toilet, we've got a very cool sneak peak at the "Comics and Videogames" spread from the 2013 Edition.

(Click to embiggen)

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Contest! Win AN IDIOT ABROAD: SEASON 2 on DVD!

January 14, 2013, 7:00 am

≫ Next: The Book Report: Print Lives, Barnes & Noble Dies? and More!

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In the second season of the hilarious series An Idiot Abroad, Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant, co-creators of The Office andExtras help their friend Karl Pilkington (The Ricky Gervais Show) complete tasks from his bucket list...except the experience is never as easy or as fun as it seems. Gervais and Merchant find ways to arrange a few surprises along the way to keep things interesting. In the end, Pilkington ends up visiting more places and suffering more detours than he did in the first season! Find out what happens when an idiot goes abroad…again! 

And we're giving away three copies!


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The Book Report: Print Lives, Barnes & Noble Dies? and More!

January 14, 2013, 8:00 am

≫ Next: LIVE ACTION TOY STORY Is Worth Your Time

≪ Previous: Contest! Win AN IDIOT ABROAD: SEASON 2 on DVD!

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The Bestselling Books of 2012
Publisher's Weekly brings us the bestselling books of last year; prepare to be shocked and outraged.

Don't Burn Your Print Books
Wall Street Journalon why print books are here to stay.

The Wheel of Time: The Last Chapter 
Tor.com presents a YouTube video on the end of the Wheel of Timeseries.


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LIVE ACTION TOY STORY Is Worth Your Time

January 14, 2013, 9:00 am

≫ Next: Damning with Faint Praise: LOOPER

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Creative wunderkinds, Jonason Pauley (age 19) and Jesse Perrotta (age 21), have taken the beloved Pixar movie Toy Story and re-created it shot-for-shot as a live-action flick using real toys.

And, believe it or not, it's really sorta great.

Now, I know that there's going to be a plethora of copycats out there re-making other animated films soon, but let's put off the inevitable slip into the horribly banal by simply embracing what these über fans were able to accomplish and smile at their nerdiness.

I know I did.
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Damning with Faint Praise: LOOPER

January 14, 2013, 10:00 am

≫ Next: MICROSOFT INTRODUCES ITS NEXT STEP IN GAMING, THE ILLUMIROOM, Which Promises to Turn Your Living Room Into A Bloodbath Without All the Sticky Goo

≪ Previous: LIVE ACTION TOY STORY Is Worth Your Time

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In Looper, the long-awaited re-teaming of star and writer-director from Brick (Joseph Gordon-Levitt, who also acted as executive producer and Rian Johnson, respectively), a self-centered assassin basically has the easiest job in the world.  At an assigned time, he shows up at a pre-defined location (same one, every time) and kills whoever appears in front of him.

And he still manages to screw it up.


Verdict
Good, but not worth a seven year wait.
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MICROSOFT INTRODUCES ITS NEXT STEP IN GAMING, THE ILLUMIROOM, Which Promises to Turn Your Living Room Into A Bloodbath Without All the Sticky Goo

January 14, 2013, 11:00 am

≫ Next: REVEALING DAVID BOWIE'S BIRTHDAY SECRET

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Microsoft, in its infinite wisdom, has designed a "proof-of-concept" gaming system that will use a Kinect camera to scan your room and can "...change the appearance of the room, induce apparent motion, extend the field of view, and enable entirely new game experiences...[and] uses the appearance and the geometry of the room (captured by Kinect) to adapt the projected visuals in real-time without any need to custom pre-process the graphics [Research Microsoft]

Basically, it promises that if you enjoy playing FPS and or Horror/Survival games, you're going to end up looking like this guy:
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